Pandemonium Megadungeon Session Report #3
Recently, I started an open-table megadungeon campaign using a megadungeon I’m working on, working-titled “Pandemonium.”
9th Day of the Month of Grief
Our party consists of:
Sōt III, Butcher of Bugs, Fighter 2; a scraggly, haggard knight missing his left ear, clad in mail-and-plate made from bone, wielding Righty, his unmagical but heavily-notched longsword.
Erasmus Karl, Fighter 1; an amiable, balding tourist taking photographs for his travel [b]log readers back home.
Shrike, Fighter 1; a sickly, cursed outlander clad in a robe of black feathers, wielding a whip.
Keviin, Fighter 1; a haunted, ex-mercenary burglar.
The party descended into the depths; went to the goblin camp and handed over a clay goblin icon they retrieved previously, depicting a goblin head made of many, smaller goblin heads. In exchange, they were granted leave to attend the lectures of Khilo, High Sage, and Bokho, Great Pedant—the two most-senior goblin academics in the camp, each clad in mortarboards and academic capes.
They sat through long lectures on metaphysics, little understood (none of the party speaks Goblinoid); volunteered for “baby lessons;” were sent to pick mushrooms; and eventually found a goblin academic who spoke the Nine Forked Tongues, the language of demons, which Shrike speaks. After some questioning regarding goblin lore and the much-mysterious Goblinscholar, the Forked Tongue-speaking goblin asked if Shrike would like to “become” a goblin. Shrike agreed, as did Erasmus, and they were led away, deeper into the goblin camp—but not before leaving behind Erasmus’s Polaris-demon camera with 7 photos’ worth left.
There, the goblin academics produced a strange syringe made from an unusual metal. After withdrawing something from the ear of a twitchy, attending goblin, they injected the syringe into Shrike’s right ear. After convulsing and twitching for a minute, Shrike was led away. Despite this strangeness, Erasmus volunteered as well, and suffered the same fate.
After waiting for a long time, Sōt and Keviin decided to leave. The goblins did not return their companions.
10th Day of the Month of Grief
Two newcomers arrived in town to join Sōt and Keviin:
The Eldest Orphan, Fighter 1; a rich-dressed noble with a fancy mohawk.
Snuffet, Magic-User 1; a sleepy, shaved-head stoner transmuter.
Together, the party went back down; attended goblin lecture for several more hours (both Snuffet and the Eldest Orphan conveniently speak Goblinoid); went to goblin lunch (terrible); Snuffet snuck a photograph of a spell from Khilo the High Sage’s dissertation-spellbook; and then struck a deal with the High Sage and Great Pedant. If the party provides 3 dwarves (or orcs, or ghouls) to be turned into goblins, the goblins will clear a previously-skeleton-held chamber to allow access down a flight of stairs. The party accepted the deal, with one week to complete the kidnappings.
The party descended the stairs; found a suspicious lever on the staircase; raided some sarcophagi for treasure; discovered a strange golden skull with ruby eyes on a plinth in a room full of burned bones; realized the stair-lever turned the stairs to a ramp; and decided to keep their winnings and retreat home. Once back at the Forsaken Inn, Snuffet examined the photograph of Khilo’s spellbook, determined it to be dominate, and transcribed it into his own clay-tablet spellbook.
11th Day of the Month of Grief
Comprised of old and new faces, our party consists of:
Sōt III, Butcher of Bugs, Fighter 2; still scraggly, still clad in bone mail-and-plate, still down his right ear, still wielding Righty.
One the Only (pronounced “own”), Fighter 2; a drunken, hungover, spear-wielding soldier.
Snuffet, Magic-User 1; a sleepy, shaved-head stoner transmuter now with a new spell.
The Eldest Orphan, Fighter 1; an increasingly-edgy noble with a mohawk.
After some shopping and loaning of silver, the party descended. They talked with the new goblin guards of the stairs down; realized the goblins might not be trustworthy; went down the same stairs; found a yellow ooze and set it on fire; found a very large room covered in an equally-large carpet; and discovered a crypt beneath the carpet, which they raided for a great deal of treasure, a map of an unknown dungeon area, a feather that points towards danger, and a pair of cursed boots of devouring.
Taking their winnings, the party retreated back upstairs to spend it all on booze, coke, and fast floozies. The Eldest Orphan and Snuffet both reached Level 2, taking on the titles The Eldest Orphan of Forsaken and Snuffet the Pointer, as Snuffet placed the danger-pointing feather into his cap.
12th Day of the Month of Grief
After descending once more, the party: rolled up the giant carpet; found a room with an almost-certain teleportation circle inscribed with circles in seven languages, only some of which could be understood; found an enormous giant-sized sarcophagus labeled “Zagan the Old” in Colossal (which Snuffet reads); met a whole bucket of skeleton mages, only placated after One offered wine at their shrine; found a hallway with some oddly-placed columns; and discovered a Scooby Doo secret rotating door!
Going through the secret door, the party discovered a large metal door decorated with patterns of human bone, and a large, ominous keyhole. Rather than try to pick it, the party decided to wait so Snuffet could ritually (and thus safely) cast knock. Hidden in their secret hallway, the hour passed without incident: Snuffed knocked and the door opened. Inside awaited a wide, square, deep hole, with four thick chains descending along each corner—a hidden elevator! Descended currently, and with no means to call it up, but a valuable shortcut nonetheless.
Suddenly, a loud crash echoed through the walls, along with a Colossal voice calling “Who dares disturb my slumber?!” The party returned to the room with the giant sarcophagus to discover a huge silver-crowned skeleton inside, mostly unable to escape his tomb but very able to swipe his giant skeletal arms at passers-by. After some discussion and learning that Zagan yearned mostly to sleep peacefully and was quite forgetful, the party offered a solution: in exchange for Zagan’s treasure, they would provide him with blankets. Traveling back and forth, the party cut up large swathes of the carpet in the previous chamber, swapping each new blanket for treasure: silver, gold, a map (which they recognized as the goblin camp, including some unexpected hidden areas), a creepy jester mask, and a pair of fancy magical boots. After briefly tangling with some kind of invisible wind monster that almost killed the Eldest Orphan, the party took their winnings and returned home—their longest descent yet, just over 4 hours beneath the Forsaken Inn.
Spending his winnings, Sōt reached level 3, taking on the title TBD. (It was late and we were tired.)
Where does the secret elevator go? Will Zagan the Old ever get a good eternity’s sleep? What will Sōt III choose as his Level 3 title? Find out next time.